A mob of confused angry leftists led by an elderly socialist up past his bedtime converged to protest somebody, anybody.
"Are you ready for a fight?" Bernie Sanders querulously cried. He sounded more like he wanted a nap.
As the countdown approached, print shops waited with bated breath to decide whose name to print on a thousand identical signs and furious community organizers slash bartenders tried to figure out how to rhyme a variety of names with 'Roe vs. Wade'.
Finally they all gathered to scream loudly that if a Republican nominee replaced another Republican nominee on the Supreme Court, it would kill absolutely everyone in America. Millions would die. Possibly billions.
A very nervous and worried Bernie Sanders showed up to explain Venezuelan economics to everybody while frantically quoting Fourier. Bewildered millennial attendees reflexively called him a racist. Meanwhile the Women's March took a break waiting for the UFOs to kill all the white people to issue a statement condemning President Trump's choice of XX.
The Women's March had put almost as much research into it as Bernie Sanders and the rest of the protesters did.
Nobody had any idea who Judge Brett Kavanaugh was. The lefties chanting, “Kavanaugh has got to go” knew even less.
XX was as good as anyone.
When you pre-write your press release slamming Trump’s SCOTUS pick but forget to add the name.... pic.twitter.com/5GiEJXMHUR
— Alex Pappas (@AlexPappas) July 10, 2018