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World's Dumbest Criminal Gets Busted Trying to Get Obama Pardon

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Obama has started a pardon rush. He's pardoning traitors and terrorists. But is he also pardoning morons?

Normally you think of art thieves as being smart. But Marcus Sanford Patmon was anything but. You might call him the Obama of art thieves. 

Marcus Sanford Patmon, 45, of Miami, was arrested Sunday outside a Starbucks in Arlington, Virginia, after a police license plate reader indicated that his parked vehicle had been reported as stolen, police said.

Ashley Savage, a police spokeswoman, told NBC Washington on Wednesday that Patmon "wanted to meet with Eric Holder" because "he was looking to be pardoned by the Obama administration before the Trump administration came in."

He almost had the right idea. But Holder is out of office. And unless Patmon is a bundler, he wouldn't be getting an appointment. Also driving a stolen car probably wasn't the best decision.

According to the FBI, Patmon pleaded guilty in 2009 to attempted wire fraud and interstate transportation of stolen property for trafficking in two stolen Pablo Picasso etchings and a stolen Marc Chagall lithograph — together worth well more than a half-million dollars.

Patmon served a little less than two years in prison and was released in 2012, federal records show.

Much of the court record remains sealed even today. But prosecutors have said Patmon told investigators he'd been inspired by an episode of the PBS series "Antiques Roadshow" to steal and resell art so he could resume the comfortable life he'd been living before he was convicted of assault in 2001. 

He would have needed to steal a lot more art to afford to buy a pardon. Just ask Marc Rich and Bill Clinton.


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