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Obama is Our Greatest Jewish Catholic Asian-Italian Lesbian President

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Barack Hussein Obama is truly all things to all people. He's an honorary Jew and more Catholic than JFK. He can out-Lama the Dalai Lama and is the biggest atheist on earth. He is truly everything. And nothing.

White House chief of staff Denis McDonough told David Axelrod on his podcast “The Axe Files” on Wednesday that President Obama is the most Catholic president in U.S. history during a conversation on faith and politics.

Axelrod, who formerly served as Obama’s senior adviser in the White House, told McDonough that the president often talked about being raised in a spiritual tradition versus a religious tradition and that he later adopted his faith when he was older living in Chicago.

“Look, I say to him, Axe, and I think I’ve said this to him in your presence and I’ve said this publicly before, I think this is our most Catholic of presidents,” McDonough said. “And I mean that by capital ‘C’ Catholic in what I see and what he does everyday.”

“It’s not to say that he does everything entirely consistent with Catholic teaching,” McDonough said. “That’s not the idea, but I think in fact his view of the person and our role and the view of us as adding to the common good is an undeniably Catholic set of premises, and that’s why I say that to him a lot.”

Of course Obama is also more Jewish than the Jews.

At the last White House Chanukah dinner, he claimed to have a Jewish soul. At a synagogue speech last month, he called himself “an honorary member of the tribe”. Now his former senior advisor has quoted him as saying, “I think I am the closest thing to a Jew that has ever sat in this office.”

Also he's an Asian-Italian Lesbian.

“I consider myself an honorary Italian, because I love all things Italian”. Newsweek dubbed him “The First Woman President” in 2008 for “bending gender conventions” and promoted him to “The First Gay President” four years later. Cabinet Secretary Lu and Congressman Honda argued that he was “The First Asian American President”.

But if you believe that religion is just a fossilized shell for spiritual values. And that these spiritual values are just social justice, then you can be the best Jewish-Catholic ever without ever practicing any of their silly old practices by championing gay marriage, transgender bathrooms and Muslim migration. Because you're really implementing their core beliefs while ignoring all the "goofy" traditions.

That's Obama in a nutshell. By being left-wing, he's more Catholic than anyone else. Also more Jewish.


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